Where is your refuge?

My morning routine [usually] looks very similar on a day-to-day basis, even on the weekends. Part of that routine involves some time in the Word. One particular resource I use during this time is the InTouch Ministries Daily Devotions, which I receive in magazine form. Last Monday's subject was Encouragement in Every Season, and the associated Scripture was Psalm 62:5-8. The devotional from Dr. Stanley focused on how God is faithful, He will do exactly what He says, He is more than adequate to meet our every need, He is always with us...you know, some fairly standard truths. One particular quote I found helpful, right at the very end of the devotional, was this:

“Difficulties may cause us to question God’s dependability. But if we’ll place our trust in our omniscient, omnipotent Father, we can begin each morning with a fresh sense of His faithfulness, which will carry us through the day."

I believe I have experienced enough life to know that to be true for myself. If I may, though, I want to speak to the passage of Scripture itself in the way that it came off to me when I read it. For reference, here it is:

⁵ My soul, wait in silence for God only,
For my hope is from Him.
⁶ He only is my rock and my salvation,
My stronghold; I shall not be shaken.
⁷ On God my salvation and my glory rest;
The rock of my strength, my refuge is in God.
⁸ Trust in Him at all times, O people;
Pour out your heart before Him;
God is a refuge for us.            Selah.        (Psalm 62:5-8 NASB)

David starts this Psalm in the first verse by making a statement: "My soul waits in silence for God only; from Him is my salvation." I find it interesting how in verse 5, as we see above, that he seems to be reminding himself that yes, indeed, you need to wait for God: He is where your hope comes from. It's probably fair to say that we need to remind ourselves of this regularly. I know I do. It is all too easy to get caught up in the things of the world. It is too easy to feel hopeless today. Not to sound cliché, but all you have to do is turn on the news. Remembering that God is our hope, that He is our stronghold, that in Him, we cannot be shaken...remembering this is paramount to surviving, especially from a mental standpoint.

What really grabbed my attention, though, was verses 7 and 8. "My refuge is in God." What is a refuge? According to Merriam-Webster, it is... 

1. shelter or protection from danger or distress
2. a place that provides shelter or protection
3. something to which one has recourse in difficulty 

God is our Creator. He knows all things. He is everywhere at once. He is all-powerful. He is so many things, and He is also our shelter from danger. He is our protector. He is our source of help in times of difficulty. When trouble comes, we can run to Him. No matter what. He is always waiting for us with open arms. We see this time and again in Scripture. Even if we are responsible for our own trouble, He still will be there for us when we decide to come home to Him. Just read the parable of the prodigal son. God's love for us is unconditional: it doesn't matter what we've done or what we're facing. We can always find refuge in Him. But if you're anything like me, you tend to forget this, often times in moments when you need God the most. And then you choose to run to someone else, or something else. Only God can fully satisfy. Plus, finding genuine refuge in Him doesn't have the possibility of further negative outcomes. Depending on what you substitute for God, you can all too easily find yourself in a cycle of unnecessary misery.

God calls to us to pour out our hearts to Him. Only He knows us well enough to take our outpourings and cause us to see ourselves for who we really are, which is who He says we are. At the end of the day, what God thinks of you is all that matters. Why wouldn't we want to run to Him for refuge in times of hardship? He is omni-everything-good. So why do we choose to take refuge elsewhere? I cannot answer that question for everybody. Some days, I don't think I could even answer that for myself. I don't want to simplify it by saying "we're human," though that is, naturally, true. One of the most frustrating things in life has got to be knowing what you should do, but not doing it (or knowing what you should not do, but doing that anyway). We think that doing what feels good for a moment will be enough to numb the pain. But it never is. We need a God who heals us, a God who sees us exactly for who we are and knows exactly how to care for us. He can certainly work through other people to help us, but if we're not doing our part of actually seeking Him, we're going to miss out on His best for us. We may even go down a path we never intended to walk.

When you find yourself in times of trouble, seek refuge: seek God. I promise you that running to anything else will only leave you wanting.

Useless for the Manure Pile

Okay, so assuming you read the title of this post, you are most likely curious enough to actually read this and are probably thinking one of the following thoughts:

• Did I actually read that correctly? (Yes, yes you did)
• It's not often that I see the word "manure," especially on the Web...
• What on God's green earth is this guy going to talk about?

Needless to say, I would agree that Useless for the Manure Pile is a very strange title indeed. However, there is a small chance that you may know what I am referencing. This phrase comes out of Luke 14:34-35, which reads:

"Therefore, salt is good; but if even salt has become tasteless, with what will it be seasoned? It is useless either for the soil or for the manure pile; it is thrown out. He who has ears to hear, let him hear." (NASB)

The greater context of this passage (verses 25-35) is where Jesus is describing how we need to carry our own cross and be willing to give up anything and everything for Him in order to be his disciple. Then we get to the salt metaphor. Essentially, what Jesus is saying here is that we are either wholly His, or we are not: there appears to be no middle ground. We are either salty and thusly effective in our daily walk of discipleship, or we are tasteless salt, which is absolutely worthless. And by worthless, I mean not even worthy of a stinking pile of manure. If you are not even worthy of being chucked into a pile of excremental fertilizer, that would put you pretty low on the totem pole.

I read this passage earlier today, and it served as a wakeup call. I pray it does for you as well. If we fail to completely give ourselves to Jesus, are we giving Him anything at all? It would seem that we cannot effectively only give a part of us to Him; it has to be everything. I will be the first one to tell you that doing so is certainly not easy, but the calling to be Christ's disciple is a calling to something greater than ourselves. We owe it to ourselves to fully serve the God who died for us simply because He loved us. If what we are currently giving Him is not even fit for the manure pile, it's probably time to make a change.

Grace: No Excuses

I was reading chapter 15 in the book of First Corinthians this morning and found verses 9-10 to stick out a bit:

"For I am the least of the apostles, and not fit to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me did not prove vain; but I labored even more than all of them, yet not I, but the grace of God with me." (1 Cor. 15:9-10 NASB)

 This is Paul speaking, and he essentially sums up something incredibly powerful. Paul was a murderer of Christians. A murderer! However, while on the way to Damascus, Paul (known as Saul at the time) encountered the all-consuming glory of Christ and was forever changed (Acts 9). In a moment, Saul the murderer became Paul the Apostle and started proclaiming the truth of Christ like nobody's business.

Because of his blood-stained past, Paul realized that he did not deserve the new life that he was given in Christ. He knew that he was inadequate. But what Paul chose to hold onto was the grace of God. By God's grace, Paul became an amazing force for advancing the kingdom, needless to say he also became one of the most talked about figures in the Bible overall. Paul recognized that despite his dark past, the grace of God made him into a new person: a person who could shed the past and make a positive, spirit-led difference in the present and future.

The grace of God is truly an amazing and beautiful thing. Without it, we would be eternally doomed. With it, we can accept what Christ has done for us, allow Him to transform our lives, and serve others as He served others. If the grace of God could transform the murderous Saul into the Apostle Paul, who is responsible for over half of the New Testament, we have no excuses when it comes to whether or not that same grace can transform us in the present day.

Do not underestimate the grace of God. As humans, I understand that it can be rather difficult at times to think about how God could extend such grace to wretches such as us. But let's face it: if God could turn a Christian-killer into one of the most successful disciple-makers of all time, what can't God do with you? We need to embrace the grace of God and allow it to truly transform us. If we genuinely allowed God to pour out His grace and mercy on us, just think of what He could accomplish through us. The thought is simply exhilarating! Nothing can separate us from the love of God (Romans 8:38-39) and He is just waiting to extend His grace to us. Accept that grace today, live in the glory of His presence, and watch as He takes you down a road of authentic satisfaction that is devoid of regret. His grace is enough, and we owe it to ourselves to take God up on such an invaluable gift.

Everything as Planned

If you know me somewhat, you should probably know that I am a fairly musical person. I not only enjoy listening to a lot of music, but I can also play a few instruments (if we have been acquainted at some point and somehow you did not come to know this, I apologize most sincerely for not sharing this with you, and we should probably grab coffee or something). That being said, I am pretty open to various types of music. I enjoy some more than others, and definitely am not a fan of yet still others.

Two genres of music that I have really enjoyed listening to in recent years are symphonic metal and melodic metalcore. I only listen to a few bands that fit within these genres, but I thoroughly enjoy the music put out by those bands. Just to quickly summarize, symphonic metal typically features an operatic female voice and combines orchestral-style music with harder rock/metal styles. Melodic metalcore also includes elements of obvious hard rock/metal styles (awesome electric guitars, double-bass drumming, etc.) as well as 'melodic' elements of keyboards, synthesizers, and sometimes orchestra-like sounds/instruments. It also features clean vocals (normal singing, if you will) and unclean vocals (probably known to most of you as 'screaming' or 'growling'). Perhaps that last bit causes you to question the validity of the genre actually being 'music.' That's alright. I can see your argument, but I hope that we can agree to disagree on that issue. I like it, and that's all that matters.

Recently, I have been listening to an album from a melodic metalcore band called We Came As Romans (WCAR). I first started listening to them during my freshmen year of college, and have since really come to enjoy their style. The band is all about loving other people. On their website, guitarist Joshua Moore says, "Love doesn't have an argument; everyone wants to love and be loved. We decided if we were going to be a band, we needed to have meaning behind it. And I don't think there is any greater meaning than to keep on spreading the idea and concept of love." That hit home with me, and has given me a new appreciation for their lyrics. Their latest album, Understanding What We've Grown to Be, deals largely with life's struggles and the many challenges we face. As I was listening through the album on the way to work in recent weeks, the second song, Everything as Planned, struck a chord within me that I just could not leave untouched.

Feel free to read through the full lyrics for this song, but, generally speaking, Everything as Planned talks about how we try to plan out our lives but find that, often, life does not go how we originally intended. It speaks of laying awake at night wondering how things would have went if they went according to plan. The song also speaks of how the songwriter learned that without properly taking care of himself, he could never truly take care of anyone else.

The writer of this song conveys that he has "built and rebuilt" the bed that he lays in at night, but always ends up "restless in the same place." I saw this as representing life in the way that sometimes, we try to do things one way, but then things happen another way, and we feel lost and confused because things have not gone our way. We find ourselves in a place of not knowing which way to go.

I am not completely sure of the direction that WCAR was trying to take with this song, but the lyrics hit me in such a way that simply has to ring true for many people. We try to live our lives out according to some plan. But, so many times, we have no control over what happens. We lose a job, lose a loved one, create an awkward relationship...the list goes on. As a result, we sometimes return back to square one and attempt to rebuild, but we end up "restless in the same place" time after time because we truly do not have ultimate control. That is why full surrender to the Lord is so important. As humans, our plans will fail at some point. Guaranteed. That is why surrendering and trusting fully in the Lord to guide you through the ups and downs of life is so crucial.

Additionally, during the course of our lives we may feel the need to help and care for others along the way. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this, but if we are not nurturing ourselves in such a way that brings us closer to the Lord and keeps us healthy, spiritually and physically, we will never be able to truly care for the other people in our lives in the most effective way possible.

If we lay in bed at night and simply mope about how everything would be if it would just go as we planned, we are in for a miserable and draining life. Get closer with the Lord: read your Bible, get on your knees and pray, worship him through song...whatever it takes. He will lead you through anything and will never leave nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5). He also knows everything about your life (Psalm 139:16). Let the plan to Him, and live as He wants you to live. You will have no need to vacillate in a pit of worry, and you will be able to be a better blessing to others.

Possible, Not Easy

Wow, it has almost been a month since my last post. My apologies, but I have an entirely good reason for putting off this post for so long.  With the exception of this week (thus far), much of my time has been spent working on a project for my Database Applications course.

On a high level, this project, the Intelligent Water Management System project (or simply IWMS), is a three-year contracted project for World Vision through my school. The basic end goal of the project is to create a web application that receives data from water pumps in Africa and allows it to be displayed and worked with in a sensible fashion. I could definitely go into more details, but that is not my purpose for today.

My class and my major's capstone course (which I will be taking next spring) started working on the IWMS project in February and are to have a primitive version of the application working by the end of the semester this May. Two Saturdays ago until the following Tuesday, I personally put in somewhere between 10-20 hours on a database-related issue for the application. Needless to say, it was a very tiring few days. In the end, the issue was resolved and other tasks were subsequently accomplished. However, the road to the end of the problem was very discouraging.

That Saturday night/Sunday morning and Sunday night/Monday morning (each night/early morning ending at about 1:30am) felt like absolute wastes of time and that I was getting nowhere. In retrospect, the 5-6 hours spent across those two days did result in a little bit of progress, but it was not until I decided to get help the following Monday afternoon from my professor that things turned around for the better. After visiting my professor, we worked out a solution in about 20 minutes that I was trying to accomplish for the previous 5-6 hours. While this was indeed a huge relief, I was a little disappointed in the seemingly unnecessary extra amount of time I put into this task.

Later that week, a great friend of mine (who was my freshman roommate, is my current RA, and will be one of my future apartment-mates next year) was talking about how he is seeing God move in regards to his duties as the Student Body Chaplain next year. He said something that gave me a fresh perspective on life: "Faith makes life possible, not easy." While my situation was not directly a faith-based battle, I earnestly believe that the entirety of it all demonstrates faith in the Christian life rather well. I struggled for a relatively long time on a particular issue, but it was not until I surrendered to the reception of help that I ultimately achieved victory. The end goal that I was trying to accomplish was indeed possible, but it was definitely not easy. However, it seemed impossible until I reached for something beyond my own strength and abilities.

In our daily life, we will face many difficult situations. As believers and followers of Christ, we have the opportunity to put our faith in a God who never fails, who will never leave us or forsake us, and who is always looking out for us. In the midst of our difficulties, we need to remember to have faith in Him who makes our life possible. Faith will not necessarily make our circumstances easier, but we can rest in God's omnipotence and omniscience and know that He will make our lives possible and that He will lead us through it all.

God cares about every detail of our lives (Luke 12:7); no matter what kind of a situation you face, bring it to God and have faith that He will lead you through the mess. He is faithful and true, and He will never let you down. Time spans may differ, but God will ultimately guide you to the end, every single time.

Reactions

Where in the world did spring break go!?!? It is truly amazing how fast that week can (and did) go by without noticing it. I suppose it was not all a blur, but wow. I am very thankful for the time I got spend with my family and friends. I even got a little homework done, but only what I absolutely needed to do; after all, it was spring break, meaning I had the right to be a little lazy...right? Of course! One of my favorite moments was right at beginning of break when I made a surprise visit to a friend of mine at work near the end of her shift. It was definitely a surprise, and it was simply great to visit and catch up. While it was a late night, it was totally worth it. There is nothing quite like the company of great friends, especially when they least expect it.

In this past week, certain thoughts had come to the forefront of my mind and decided to re-introduce a mental struggle of sorts. Generally, I tend to go a little crazy when there is a lot on my plate and simply do nothing because I cannot decided what to do first because everything seems to be equally trying to gain my attention. In regards to this past week, a particular circumstance (which, truth be told, was rather trivial) was just owning my thoughts and keeping me from being myself. I did not have a good reason to let this particular issue control my actions, but alas, that is exactly what happened. When you let some of the smaller things in this life overpower that which is more important, you will quickly find that you will not be as satisfied or content as you really should.

Somewhere in the middle of that mental battle, however, I was having a conversation with my Dad when he said something that I will not soon easily forget: "You cannot change the way things happen, but you can control how you react to them." Unfortunately, I forget the overall context of the conversation (but I do know it had nothing to do with that which I had been struggling), but that is besides the point. What my Dad said hit me right between the eyes; not only was this applicable to my current situation, but it is applicable to daily life in general. This life principle is truly a gem, and it is another reason why I cannot express how grateful I am for my Dad.

Life will constantly throw a myriad of circumstances our way, good and bad, and we will ultimately have little to no control over how those things come to pass. However, the way we choose to handle those circumstances can make all the difference in our lives. We can choose to wallow in a state of misery or perpetually complain about the undesirable situations. But will that get us anywhere? More than likely, no, it will not. The desirable experiences of this life are always easy to live out, but it tends to be the undesirable experiences that reveal our true colors. If we can be mature enough, strong enough, and faithful enough to react to any and all circumstances with a heart of purity and the desire to grow into the people God calls us to become, imagine how different the world could be.

Making a Difference

Allow me to preface what I am about to say by officially welcoming myself to the blogging world. Yay!! *Confetti* *Other Random Party Effects* This is definitely something new for me, unless, of course, you count micro-blogging via Twitter. By the way, follow me: @zkantner. Anyway...

As I was saying, blogging is basically a new concept for me, but I feel rather inclined to give it a go. Why, you may ask? Two reasons. The first is simply that I want to express some of my thoughts in writing, cacophonous as they may end up being. Writing is a primary form of communication, the quality of which seems to be running down the drain at an exponentially increasing rate among people my age and younger. I want to further develop my personal writing technique and hopefully stir up some healthy conversation at the same time. The second reason is more or less a child of the first: I think about/read about/hear about various different things every week, and I feel as if I just do not give some of a majority of those things a fighting chance outside of a short one to two minute conversation with a friend or two. Do I expect everyone and their mother to read and respond to what I have to say? Of course not, but there is nothing wrong with at least putting some thoughts out there for anyone who cares to take a look. So, here's to a new experience with endless possibilities!

Last night I attended a short chapel for the Collaboratory at school. This particular chapel is a weekly occurrence which takes place before the various Collab groups go their separate ways and work on various projects that have worldwide impact (such as projects with World Vision). This particular chapel featured Dr. Michael Zigarelli, a professor of leadership and strategy. I unfortunately have not had the pleasure of having him for a class yet, but I will at some point next year (and I am genuinely excited for when that opportunity finally arrives).

Dr. Zigarelli spoke to us of an event that happened back in 1999 when he used to work at Fairfield University in Connecticut. One day he noticed that when his young son went out to get the paper, he stood at the end of the driveway staring into the sky at some unknown yet captivating sight. Dr. Zigarelli figured he might as well have a look since his son, at this age, would only pay attention to Barney and related TV shows for the same span of time that he spent staring into the sky on this morning. It turns out that the boy was looking at three news helicopters hovering not to far out in the distance behind their house. Later that day, Dr. Zigarelli learned that these helicopters were hovering above a scene where, hours before in the dead of night, a single mother and her four sons were killed by an Amtrak train. The mother was running across the tracks to retrieve her youngest son when the horrific incident occurred.

After recalling the incident, Dr. Zigarelli went on to mention that this woman, Julia Toledo de Urgiles, happened to be a custodian at Fairfield University, the very same place where he worked. She happened to be struggling to pay for everything. She was only making minimum wage and was attempting to support four children as a single mother. Dr. Zigarelli and Julia never had contact with one another, but Julia represented a type of person that many of us tend to ignore or may even be ourselves. She was invisible. She was one of the people that many of us today simply overlook. There are just some people with whom we do not concern ourselves. It is a downright regrettable truth. We live our lives, interact with those we know, and try our best to stay out of everyone else's business. But when we step back and take a minute to examine the situation, there are many invisible people, like Julia and her children, who are very real people with very real lives and very real problems. And like the rest of us, they deserve the same love and respect that we give our friends.

In the words of Dr. Zigarelli, "In Jesus Christ, there are no invisible people." Everyone in this world longs to be loved, cared about, listened to. What if we actually took the time to give someone else a little bit of our time? What if we chose to dwell with those who, in our selfish and corrupted mindsets, appear to be below us when really they are people just like us? What if we gave that person across the coffee shop a chance to feel like a real human being? What if we actually loved people the way Jesus taught us to love? I think the world would be a very different and more likable place.

"Making a difference begins with one person at a time. Making a difference begins with one conversation at a time." These words from Dr. Zigarelli struck me at the core last night. If someone had taken the time to get to know Julia, maybe offer her some help, would her situation have been any different? We will never know, but I would go out on a limb to say that circumstances would most definitely have been different.  It is time we all reconsidered how we go about our daily lives.  For all we know, one conversation could make a world of difference in someone's life.  If we are so busy that we cannot find even a few minutes to engage in someone else's life to make them feel like they matter, then our priorities are way out of order.


Romans 12:9-13